At 63 years old, I have come to terms with a lot of things in life. I have lived, I have laughed, and I have experienced all the difficulties that life can throw at you. I have had an enriching career in publishing that has spanned decades, I have built connections, and I have poured my energy into creating value for aspiring authors and professionals. But over the past few years, something life-altering happened that I did not foresee I was diagnosed with Chronic Kidney Disease (CKD). And that diagnosis has redefined the way I think about my future.

For the last three years, I have been on dialysis, tethered to a machine that keeps me alive but also limits the freedom I once took for granted. It is not just the inconvenience of spending hours at a dialysis clinic multiple times a week—it is the physical and emotional toll it takes. And while dialysis has allowed me to continue living, it is not a permanent solution. My best chance for a better quality of life is a kidney transplant. That is why I am reaching out to you, hoping you will consider the possibility of being my living kidney donor.

Life Before Dialysis

To understand what life on dialysis feels like, it is important to take a step back and reflect on what life was like before this new normal set in. For much of my adult life, I led a full, active lifestyle. Between my publishing career, my blog, my dogs, and my personal life, I always found time for the things that mattered most to me. My fiancée, Susan, was a bright light in my life, and even though she passed away in 2014 while waiting for her own liver transplant, her memory continues to inspire me every day. I still cherish the days we spent together with Derek, the corgi she picked out. Derek recently passed, too, but the joy he brought into my life lingers.

Back then, I was not thinking about my health in the same way I do now. Sure, I knew I was not invincible, but CKD was not something that even crossed my mind. Yet, like many others with this condition, the symptoms crept up gradually. Fatigue, swelling, changes in urination—it is easy to dismiss these signs as part of getting older or just stress. But before I knew it, I was told that my kidneys were failing, and I would need dialysis to stay alive.

The Realities of Dialysis

Dialysis is often described clinically: a process that helps filter your blood when your kidneys cannot do the job anymore. It sounds simple, doesn’t it? But in reality, it is anything but. When you are on dialysis, it becomes a central part of your life, dictating your schedule, your energy levels, and your outlook.

Three times a week, for about four hours each session, I am hooked up to a machine that cleans my blood. During those sessions, I try to stay productive, reading or blogging about the world of publishing. But no matter how much I keep my mind engaged, my body feels the weight of the process. I leave those sessions exhausted, drained both physically and emotionally. Sometimes I come home and need hours just to recover. My energy fluctuates, and there are days when I do not feel like myself.

Dialysis is not living—it is surviving. It is a stopgap, a means to an end. But the real solution, the one that could give me back the quality of life I so deeply miss, is a kidney transplant.

Why a Living Donor?

Many people wonder why I am specifically looking for a living donor. The reality is that the waitlist for a kidney from a deceased donor is long—years long. Time is something I do not have the luxury to waste. With each passing year, the challenges of dialysis take a greater toll. A living donor kidney also tends to work better and last longer than one from a deceased donor. It is a better chance at a new life.

But asking for a kidney is no small thing. I recognize the gravity of this request. To ask someone to donate a part of themselves to save my life is an enormous favor. It is the ultimate gift, one that could completely transform my future.

And here is the thing: living kidney donation is safe. The human body only needs one kidney to function properly, and donors typically go on to live healthy, full lives after the procedure. There are risks involved, of course, but for many donors, the knowledge that they have saved a life far outweighs those risks. It is an extraordinary act of kindness, and if you are reading this, you are someone who has considered such a monumental gesture.

The Impact of a Kidney Donation

Let me paint you a picture of what a successful kidney donation could mean for me. Imagine no more dialysis sessions, no more fatigue dictating my days, no more health constraints keeping me from doing the things I love. With a new kidney, I would regain my independence. I could travel again, without worrying about dialysis centers at every destination. I could spend more time working on my passion projects in publishing and help more aspiring authors bring their stories to life. I could enjoy my days with the kind of energy that used to come naturally to me.

And, honestly, it would mean the world just to have a sense of normalcy again. To not feel tethered to a machine. To wake up in the morning with the hope that the day will bring new opportunities, rather than the dread of another draining dialysis session.

You Could Be the Reason I Smile Again

So here I am, reaching out, sharing my story, and hoping that someone reading this might consider being the person who helps me smile again—someone who can give me back the life that is currently slipping away. It is not an easy decision, and it is one that should be made with a lot of thought and care. But if you have ever wondered what it feels like to change someone’s life in the most profound way possible, this could be your opportunity.

I know not everyone can donate, and that is okay. But if my story resonates with you, if you feel a connection and think that you could be the match I am looking for, I encourage you to take the next step and explore the possibility. You would not only be giving me the gift of life—you would be changing the trajectory of everything I hope to accomplish in the years ahead.

How You Can Help

If you are interested in becoming a living kidney donor or simply want to learn more about the process, there are many resources available that explain the steps, the risks, and the potential rewards. Hospitals and transplant centers offer extensive information and can guide you through the evaluation process. It is important to note that all potential donors go through a rigorous screening process to ensure they are a good match, and that the donation will not negatively impact their own health.

The screening includes medical evaluations, blood tests, and psychological assessments to make sure you are physically and mentally prepared for the donation. Donors are supported every step of the way, with medical teams who are dedicated to ensuring a positive outcome for both the donor and recipient.

And if you cannot be a donor yourself, spreading the word can also make an enormous difference. Sharing my story with your friends, family, or community could help me connect with someone who might be willing to take that step.

The Gift of Hope

Living with Chronic Kidney Disease is a constant reminder of life’s fragility, but it has also taught me a lot about hope, resilience, and the kindness of others. Each day that passes brings with it challenges, but it also brings the possibility of new connections—new opportunities for someone to step forward and say, “I can help.”

I am holding onto that hope with everything I have got. And while I may not be able to do everything I used to; I am still pushing forward. I am still fighting for a future where I can be healthy, where I can live without the burden of dialysis. And I am hoping that, through this message, someone out there might be the person who helps make that future a reality.

If you have ever considered organ donation or even just want to learn more, I would be eternally grateful. Being a living kidney donor is one of the most selfless acts imaginable, and it has the power to give someone like me a second chance at life.

So, here is my ask: Be the reason I smile again. Be the person who helps me get back to living life fully, without the constant shadow of dialysis looming over me. Be the reason I have hope for tomorrow.

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